Rounding 3rd and heading home: My Senior Year

Going into my senior year, I have found myself thinking a lot about the person I was when I first stepped onto campus.

Four years ago, I thought I knew exactly what I wanted my life to look like. 

I came to Carroll as a nursing student. I had a plan for my major, a plan for my classes and, at least in my head, a plan for my future. 

I think that is something a lot of college students can relate to. When you are 18, there is this pressure to know what you need to do with the rest of your life. 

I was convinced I had to have it figured out. 

Then I got to college and realized I didn’t. 

Nursing was not for me. 

Coming in, I thought nursing would fulfill my desire to help others, but over time, I realized that it wasn’t the right path for me. 

Admitting that was not necessarily easy. Changing your major can feel like admitting you made the wrong decision, especially when you came into college thinking you had everything planned out. I had already pictured what my future would look like, and suddenly I had to rethink it. 

By the end of my sophomore year, I decided to switch my major to communication. 

And, honestly, my initial reason was not very exciting. Communications required the fewest classes for me to still graduate on time, so it seemed like the easiest option. 

At the time, I did not think much of it. 

I definitely did not expect communications to become something I genuinely loved. 

As I started taking more communications classes, I began to realize how much I enjoyed them. I liked being creative. I liked writing. I liked learning how people communicate with each other. 

Most of all, I became interested in social media. 

Social media had always been something I enjoyed in my personal life, but I started looking at it differently once I began studying communication. 

I started noticing why certain posts worked, how organizations built their online presence, and how much thought can go into something that may only take a few seconds for someone else to scroll past. 

I realized there is so much more to social media than simply posting a picture or writing a caption. 

There is creativity. There is strategy. There is storytelling. 

And there is a huge opportunity to connect with people. 

That is when communication started becoming more than just the major I picked because it was convenient. 

It became something I could actually see myself building a career around. 

Looking back, it is kind of funny to think about how different my college experience could have been if I stayed in the path I originally planned. 

I might have spent four years working towards a career I eventually realized I did not want. Instead, I changed direction and found something I am passionate about. 

That is probably one of the biggest things college has taught me: changing your mind does not mean you failed. 

Sometimes it means you learned something about yourself. 

I think there is a lot of pressure surrounding the idea of choosing a major. You are expected to pick something that will lead to a career, and you are often asked what you want to do after graduation before you even really know what you enjoy doing. 

But how are we supposed to know? 

We are still figuring ourselves out. 

College is one of the first times in our lives when we get to make so many decisions for ourselves. We meet new people, try new things, take classes we never thought we would take, and discover interests we did not know we had. 

Sometimes that means the plan changes. 

And sometimes the plan changes more than once. 

Now, as I begin my senior year, I am trying to remind myself that I do not need to have every part of my future figured out. 

That is easier said than done. 

There is something about being a senior that makes the future feel very real. For the first few years of college, graduation feels far away. You can always tell yourself, “I still have time.” 

Then suddenly, you are a senior. 

People start asking what you are doing after graduation. Professors talk about careers. Job postings become a little more interesting. You start thinking about where you will live, what you will do, and what comes next. 

It can be exciting, but it can also be overwhelming. 

I still do not know exactly what my life will look like after Carroll, and I am learning that maybe that is OK. 

What I do know is that I want to do something creative. 

I want to work with social media. 

I want to communicate and create things that people connect with. 

I want to find a career that makes me excited to show up and do the work.

Four years ago, I thought success meant sticking to the plan.

Now, I think success can also mean having the courage to change it. 

My journey through college has not been a straight line. I started in one place, changed direction, and ended up somewhere I never expected to be. 

And I am grateful for that. 

I am grateful that I gave myself permission to admit nursing was not right for me. 

I am grateful I chose communications, even if my original reason for choosing it was simply because it made the most sense at the time. 

I am grateful for the classes, experiences, and people who helped me discover what I am passionate about. 

Most of all, I am grateful that I did not let the fear of changing my plans keep me from finding something better. 

I have changed my goals. I have changed my idea of what my future is supposed to look like. 

And I am sure I will change again. 

Maybe that is the point. 

We spend so much time worrying about having everything figured out that we forget we are allowed to figure things out as we go. 

So, as I start my final year at Carroll, I am trying not to focus too much on what comes next. Instead, I want to appreciate where I am right now. 

I want to enjoy the classes, the late nights, the random conversations with friends, the campus traditions, and even the moments that I know I will probably miss when I am gone. 

I came to Carroll thinking I knew exactly where I was going. 

Now, as a senior, I am realizing that I do not need to know exactly where I am going. 

I just need to know that I am headed in a direction that feels right for me. 

And for the first time, I think I am on track.